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All in the World of the Living

Posted on June 6, 2009
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I have been thinking lately… thinking about my life.

My mind is confused and my heart is heavy. Probably because of thoughts and emotions intertwined in complexity and turmoil. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know how to stop.

I remember someone saying that you can describe LIFE in three words. It goes on. True enough, it does. Just like in a race, when one falls, the others go on and continue. At times when you feel you hit rock bottom, the world doesn’t stop to morn with you, to be sad with you, to simply listen to you. Things keep on moving. People keep on living. That’s just how things are in this world of the living.

I would say that right now, I’m once again in a crossroad. Faced with a choice of changing my world or changing my self. There are times in one’s life that you tend to be too comfortable of what you are and what you have that you don’t accept change. You resist change. I guess that’s where I am. I am stuck in this small, little comfortable air bubble that I call my reality and simply ignores the harsh realities that I should be dealing with outside.

Whenever you are outside your comfort zone, you are vulnerable. And basically, I don’t want to feel such. To simply put it, I’m not much of a risk taker. I play safe. And I guess that’s where trouble begins. Whenever trouble boils, I tend to shield myself by going inside my bubble, my mental place of safety. I stay there and wait until the coast is clear. I find out later on that the world has passed by me.

Resistance to change is resistance to growth. I know I’m preaching ironically. But saying it boldly is something to start with. I hate change probably because I hate to grow. Why do I hate to grow? Because it’s painful. Who wants pain right? But should one stop growing just because it’s painful?

It’s often difficult to bring yourself to conclusion. As a person, we usually solicit advice from others who know us and see us in a different light. Right now, I’m writing “out loud” my thoughts. This way, I get to document it. Read it. And make it a reality. As writing they say is therapeutic, it is as well a means to personal realization and resolution. I hope to reach that stage, that part where happy endings are simply the beginnings.

I remember one time I took this “How Geek are You” test in facebook. The result made me smirk. It said I am not really a geek but just a dreamer caught in my little own world. It was fun. But I felt it was true as well. It brought about a silent reality in me, a confirming thought I tried to avoid.

So I guess this is where I am right now. A lot must be done, inside and out. I guess what you feel inside manifests outside, in your actions, your words. Cleaning the outside is but a useless effort if one does not begin within. Once again, I’m preaching ironically here. But I guess that’s just how I talk to myself.

Life is hard and avoiding it makes it much worse. One just have to learn to live with the fact that things just don’t always go our way. Quoting one book, “The world does not owe us a living. In fact, it does not owe us anything. It was here first”. Very true.

I guess I just have to learn to swallow what I find difficult to swallow. That’s just how it is – all in the world of the living.

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The Day She Left

Posted on November 30, 2008
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Well, the day has finally come. It has been a few weeks now that her flight has been delayed due to some requirements the agency failed to account. Oh well, I guess it was a blessing in disguise. I was able to spend more time with her.

I didn’t realize how sad it is until the day finally came. Most of the time, I was going on with my daily routine. Although this has always been what she wanted – to live and work abroad, getting the real deal is always overwhelming.

I have tried a few months living with her far away from me. But at that time, she was just an hour of plane ride away. We frequently communicate as well so that was less of a challenge than what it would be now.

It is always fun to have your best friend around. Yes, she is my best friend – her being my girlfriend is just secondary. I don’t know why but for me, friendship has always been what bonds us even during the times when you don’t feel romantic. It sticks out everytime we have misunderstandings. It makes everyday that we are together much more fun and exciting.

Well, today might be one of the saddest days I have but I am more hopeful than not. I know this is something that God gave to her. It may be difficult for her, me or her family but she will reap whatever learning she will have from this experience.

Someday, we will see each other again. For now, I will keep her safe in my heart, until the day comes…

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Working My Work Attitude

Posted on August 20, 2008
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I went home early today. I had a training from 8am to 5pm so I get to go home by 5:20pm or so. As usual, I took the route I usually take walking back to my apartment.

It’s funny what happens when you spend too much time alone – you get to ask a lot of questions about yourself and your life. I have always wondered and this evening, I did again, why I have issues with having a job. It’s not really about a specific job like the one I have right now but more of… why do we need to work.

I might sound stupid about this. Maybe I am. But please pardon me. This is something I did not grow up with – having the right attitude towards work.

When I arrived at the apartment, I had a little time resting alone in my room, half naked with the lights turned off. I was resting my mind when I fell asleep for awhile. It was more of a nap actually. When I woke up, I decided to get some dinner. I bought some around the corner and treated myself with a movie entitled “Pursuit of Happyness” by Will Smith. Yes, the title is misspelled but try to watch the movie and you’ll understand why.

Well, expectedly (as I presume you are guessing as well) the movie gave me insights to my question.

You see, all the while I thought I was looking for real happiness in my work. I was wrong. I realized it was not true happiness I was searching for but immediate gratification – gratification with having fun at work, gratification with finding people to listen to your rants, gratification with things even outside work. I wasn’t looking for it at the wrong place. I was looking for the wrong thing at my work.

I realized that true happiness isn’t something you feel yourself. True happiness is finding someone else find happiness because of you. That kind of happiness is what drives you to overlook your own emotions, your own concerns, your own issues. Thinking about someone else outside yourself gets you going even if you don’t feel fine. Seeing people you love most being happy makes you happier than they themselves are. It’s the key to satisfaction. It is the key to finding real happiness. It drives you like the gasoline in a car. You have the engine. You just got to let it run with other people’s happiness as the fuel.

Looking into myself at the moment, there has been a few “givens” that I believe are factors to why I feel such. One is, I am the youngest in the family and I grew up not minding any younger sibling but myself. My immediate satisfaction is the driving force. Second thing, I grew up in a family where a job is done not because it is self-rewarding but because there is a consequence for not doing the job right. I grew up doing household chores out of fear and not out of love. I don’t regret this nor do I blame my parents for it. I believe things happen for a purpose and, as one good and knowledgeable colleague told me during my latest business trip, there is a time for everything. And I believe this is the time for me to learn that. I know learning it is more than just realizing it, but at least it is a start.

Saying such, I realize day by day the purpose why I got this job. Well, for one, all I wanted a few months back was actually finding a job where I could practice my course and at the same time work on something related to information technology. Next to that, I desired for a job that gets me to save for my future when I decide to settle, get married and start my own family. That dream job is basically my job right now. And, not to brag, I admittedly am in one of the best multinational companies in the world.

I just realize how much I despise the gifts I have been receiving just because I do not get immediate gratification with things I face. The movie I watched awhile ago made me realize that. I know I still have a lot to do to get a regular status for the job and often times, I just think in advance that in case I don’t get the job, I could just go back to my home town and do stuff for a living on my own. I don’t mean to degrade what I have back at home but then I realized that often times, whenever I think of such, I am just actually giving myself an excuse not to do my best with what I have right now. I mean, one knows deep inside when one gives his best to something or not. This job is a gift and God wants me to be a good steward for it. If, in the best of my knowledge, I know that I have given my best to it but still not get a regular status for the job, then I would know that the training period was enough for me to learn the stuff I need to know on this experience.

But, until then, I must patiently and consistently seek true “happyness” at work or with my loved ones. Only then will I find fulfilment and do my best in whatever I do.

As a figure of speech, here is my take: The mist is getting thinner and the road is getting clearer. Your clothes may get damp often, your feet may get tired with walking and your pain may bring tears to your eyes along the way. But then, finding out that the people you carry in your heart remain rested, joyful and happy, then the pain goes away with their laughter.

Whatever you do, don’t forget to cherish each moment. Laugh a lot. Love. Live. After all, we only get it once.

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Deep Thoughts in a Cold Night

Posted on August 14, 2008
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It’s a cold night. The air conditioning at the office was enough to make everybody shiver. Not everyone is here. Almost a third of my officemates went to their department’s team building. That leaves the office building to a few of us. It’s one reason actually why the air conditioning is too cold – there are not enough people to add warmth around.

I’m staying late tonight. I have a few international calls from my team across the globe. That’s what you get from a team of across timelines. Oh well.

A few hours ago, the rain was heavy outside. Working at a high rise building lets you hear thunder in threatening volume. The rain has now subsided. As for me, I’m sitting on this half-lit room waiting for my calls. I can see the city lights from here. Street lamps mark the way of the avenue just beside the building. Vehicles were lining up, most are probably heading home. I look at the evening sky and I guess it’s pretty much what it is – just another night in the big city. Where the sun sets and rises in the morning. Tomorrow, it will just be another day.

Across the office building is a hotel rising high. Some rooms are lit, fascinatingly displaying what transpires on those rooms. Honeymooners, travellers, or families, each with their lives spent on one of those hotel rooms. It amazes me how life goes on from corner to corner.

There may be times that one desires for the world to simply stop, to pause for awhile. What if that happens tomorrow. One wakes up to a world where nobody is there, where you still have cars on the streets, buildings lit up from last night’s use and where restaurants and bars still with their blinking lights. What if one morning, one wakes up to find out that all he has done for a lifetime are no longer worth a thing. The world becomes his, yet owns it alone, with no one else left in the world but himself. Will those things that used to be so valuable still be what they were? One can then have the finest cars and the most expensive jewelleries. One can travel the world and see the most wonderful places on earth with no one to stop him or her. Could those things by then still be as precious as what they are right now?

I guess you know the answer.

Moments like these are moments that bring me to deeper thoughts, things that one usually ignores at the height of the day when one is busy working or doing things in order to survive. A friend of mine told me that sometimes, we take these things as an excuse from doing the things that we need to do like work and earn money. That may be true to some extent but then, one could also not deny the fact that life is but a fleeting moment and that it is never impossible that in an instant, one’s death could come which makes all of these things that are necessities for our survival become worthless.

I guess the thing for this post is that, there are two timelines for our conscious mind – one is the immediate timeline that reminds us to work for food and for our daily survival. The other is the eternal timeline, the awareness that , when we die, life continues for others who are still living and what happens to us by then is quite unknown to us. These two timelines, though seemingly contradicting each other are actually working hand-in-hand. It reminds us that while we need to consider our immediate needs today, we must realize that there is another span of time that lasts long after we are gone. It challenges us to search for realities of that eternal timeline, a timeline that answers our questions about the meaning of our very existence.

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Back to My Abode

Posted on August 10, 2008
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Hi Blog. It’s me again. It’s been a while that I haven’t written on you. Well, things are happening fast. Too fast that I can’t find the time to take note the details. Hmm, where did I left… Oh yes. My trip to Singapore.

Well, it was a great experience. And when I say great, I mean overwhelming. It was quite too much for me honestly – my first international flight, my first business trip, my first time to work with people from across countries and cultures, and yes, first time to meet my boss, my boss’ boss.. and my boss’ boss’ boss! Whew!

Please don’t get me wrong. My bosses are great people, fairly in touch with their lighter side. It’s just that, most of the things I’m dealing with everyday are pretty much new to me too – the people I meet on the streets, the people I cross the streets with, the people living across my apartment’s window are new to me. I was still on my adjustment stage when I flew for Singapore. That probably caused the balloon to bloat. Good thing it did not pop – yet..

One good thing with the trip though, is it made Makati much more of a home to me. It made me appreciate the boundaries of my own country. Singapore was beautiful, way more beautiful than any place I’ve ever been. Yet, I still could say, there is no place like home.

After the Singapore trip, I flew back and went straight to my apartment. What greeted me was darkness. My uncle was in a night shift again so nobody’s home. No welcomes and no “how was the trip” thing when I arrived. Just the silent, small apartment I began renting about a month ago.

The after the Singapore trip, my boss came to our office here in Makati to on-board me to my specific tasks. The whole week wasn’t a torture but undeniably critical for me. I mean, I need to get as much information in a little amount of time. After that, only remote communication for queries. It was interestingly challenging.

Then, last night, I went out with two old buddies of mine from college. We were in a choir together and it was fun being with old friends you are comfortable enough to burst out in laughter.

I was actually telling them how things are going with my new life here. One good point that my friend told me was that I am probably facing quarter life crisis – my transition from pre-adulthood to full adulthood. I felt it was very right. I mean, I realized when he raised that point that I am actually in denial of the things that are coming my way. He pointed out how in high school or college that our goals are actually laid down on us – do your assignments and answer your exams well to get high grades so that you’ll pass the semester. When you pass the semester, enroll and do so all over again for the incoming semester until you graduate. That was it back in school.

But now, everything is laid down before you – you do the choosing. The choices you make today will affect what happens to you in the future. Making those life-changing choices are a big thing, those which used to be only for the big guys. Now, I am actually getting into that stage, making choices that shape my life. Sometimes, I just want to get away from those decision making and want to live my life free and careless.

It’s difficult when what you need to do is different from what you want to do. It’s not about the job I have. It’s about the life I have now. You see, I want to always be in a comfortable situation (who doesn’t want to be, right?). In my case, that means living back in my parents’ house and doing my stuff with my computer, designing websites and playing computer games. But then, that is not what I need to do. I need to work well for a successful career in order for my future plans to come true. I want to have a family of my own soon, provide for them well with the best that I can. On the other hand, the inner child in me doesn’t want to let go of the comforts of my home and the fun and laughter of good old childhood days.

Maybe this is what Antoine de Exupery was talking about in his book. In order for a boy to be a man, he has to let go of his childish ways. Growing up is indeed difficult, and with it is learning that you bring for a lifetime.

Many times, I sit in silence, sorting out things in my mind, the things that I see, hear and feel. Just this evening, I went to have shower. One hand was reaching for the soap while the other turns the shower knob. The water was flowing down my chest. The warmth the humid air brings was gone for some time. I closed my eyes and it was a moment of bliss. Getting naked is refreshing. It frees you from clothes that symbolizes what you are on the outside world. When you bare yourself of it, all that is left is the real you, little, fragile and afraid. The real you is that little boy or girl that has worn the body of a grown-up to be able to live the life that the society wants him or her to live.

Life is fun. But life is not all fun. Life is also tears and pain. Life is a combination of the pleasant and the unpleasant. It is then that we make a choice to see what is beautiful and love-worth. It is in our brokenness that life’s small details become precious.

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Singapore, Here I Come

Posted on July 27, 2008
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At last the rush was hushed!

A few hours back, I was waiting for the pick-up car at my apartment. The rain poured heavily and made me worry a bit the trip. I went outside the gate to check if the driver found my place. Around the corner went a white rent-a-car. It saw me so it went straight to where I was standing. I loaded my stuff and off I go to the airport.

When I arrived, I was finding my way through it. It was a different international airport, an old one actually where most of the Asian airlines are. I went straight to the queue where many are apparently checking-in early. I gathered up all the documents needed. When my time came, I prompted the airline lady to put “fragile” label on my suitcase. An officemate asked me to bring with me some of their materials for the meeting that we are going to have in Singapore. It was light really but quite bulky.

Good thing my eldest sister gave me tips on boarding for Singapore. She lives in Australia so she frequently goes to Singapore each time she goes home from a trip to the Philippines.

After checking in, I went straight to pay the terminal fee and then to the immigration. There were several windows open. I noticed that some queues are longer than the others. Apparently, people know that female immigration agents entertain better than males as their queue are longer. Sadly for me though, as this is my first international flight, I didn’t know that. I went to line up a short queue. Later, I learned the reason why. The agent was strict (and a snobb). He raised his voice at me when I wasn’t able to give him all the documents all at once. I was about to react a bit but then decided to let it go. I might not get approved, hehe. Also, I need to be cleared with my scholarship restrictions. It really helps to be patient most of the time. It saves you time for argument, your temper and your poise. People who don’t treat you well don’t deserve your attention.

At last, all was well and here I am, waiting for boarding. I am a bit excited really. Much of this trip was just a dream a few months back. I never imagined I get the chance to see another country with my scholarship holding me back. Yet, here I am, waiting for my flight.

A few minutes passed and people came to fill in the previously empty seats. White, black, brown people gathered together, waiting for their plane to arrive. Strangely, people filled other empty seats with their bags so people who came late had to seats on either their sturdy luggage or on the floor. The white ones don’t mind where they seat as long as they are comfortable. The brown ones however remain standing as sitting on the floor is not common to them. It looks too informal probably, not quite sure. It’s just that sitting on the floor is not a custom to brown, especially Filipinos like me.

Four minutes before boarding and everyone seemed occupied with either, reading, listening to the music or staring at other people. I however had the liberty to write details about their behaviours. There might be someone else in the crowd doing the same, I don’t know. They might be having the same fun as I have.

Oh, before I forget, nail biting is also one of the most common things people do while waiting for their plane. Well, I guess anxiety brings them to bite their irresistible nails. I hope they cleaned it well before hand.

I remember a few months back I went wishing to see Europe and other countries. Though this flight is just within Asia, at least it’s a start.

Singapore, here I come!

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Flight Plan

Posted on July 27, 2008
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The sun did not shine this morning. The sky dimmed by heavy clouds was still pouring from the heavy rain last night as I woke. I hope this does not stay long. In a few hours, I am bound for Singapore. The department has a meeting and my boss decided to let me meet the people I will be working closely with.

Though much of the trip will be work, still it’s fun enough to let you travel around. I mean, for me, it’s a big thing. You see, I have this government scholarship in college that’s keeping me within the bounds of my country. The government office however allows business trips like this as they see it necessary for scholars to often go out for trainings. The limitations are actually the way we scholars pay the government – to work for the country.

Sweat runs down my chest as I write. The rains have probably left the atmosphere with humid air. Or, it could be that my apartment isn’t just well ventilated. Music is playing from my laptop, filling the ground floor with fun music. Well, it’s the only noise I can create as I don’t have a television yet. I’m not planning to buy one soon though. I hope the neighbours don’t mind too.

Last night, I was packing my things up for the week’s stay. I slept late but all fun to do. My shoulders are a little tense though, probably because of cold air last evening. I hope I get to see the best of Singapore. I have always wanted to buy my own DSLR camera. When this Singapore trip was approved, I finally decided to buy one. I got mine last weekend and I was thrilled. I am still actually as the trip is still to be. I got my girlfriend all envious about it. Haha. She have been thinking of getting one too. If her Canada job pushes through, for sure she’ll get one for the trip.

Not much to do but idle around and wait for the car to pick me up at my place by 3pm. Hope I get to post with more sense and thrill next, time..

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Wish Me Luck

Posted on June 30, 2008
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Set in the silence of my room, in the heart of the big city, I write this. What has been a whirlwind of events that has transpired the past few days are beginning to fall into place, into what I can call a new life.

 

A few weeks back, I received a call from a company which is a dream for many in my league. I have been offered a job. It was overwhelming. I believe it was something given not merely by man but by some divine providence. The job has been going on in my mind for months, since I left my last job to do what I love the most – creating my own digital works of art. I desired to have a job that merges what my academic orientation was with my passion. The job was the very thing I prayed for.

 

When I broke the news to my parents, they were happy too. Although I know, at the back of their minds, they were sad – for the last chick was about to leave the nest and go into the forest to make its own living and try to survive. I can read my mother’s prayers in her eyes each time I look at her. It has also been a year that I was out of work so I had a great deal of time to be with my old folks.

 

In about a year I was with them, I learned so much more than all my learning at school combined. I saw how they laughed. I saw how they cry. I saw how strong they were, and I saw how weak they can get. Their age brought with them wisdom never found in anything so far in my life. They try their best to ready their children but they could only do so much.

 

My parents are not perfect. In fact, they are far from that. My mom had her share of failures and mistakes. My dad had a problem with loneliness and a lot of things more. For all those years we were with him, he was always silent. And now, that everyone has flown out of the house to build their own lives, it was too late for him to realize how absent emotionally he was in the lives of his children. They were never perfect. But they were the best I could ever wish for.

 

I saw their battle with age. I often find my mom mixing a hair-dye powder in a cup of warm water. Later on, they would be busy dyeing each other’s hair – much more of a bonding time.

 

My dad was often in rage in dealing with memory loss. He was ill-tempered and impatient. He kept pushing that he has this Alzheimer’s disease. All the doctors think otherwise. So do I.

 

It came to a point that my dad’s problems affected his work. He will be retiring in about eight months as of this writing. He is in a retiring age since he started to work only later in his life. He was becoming a nuisance in the office. My mom had a call from his supervisor so I went to accompany her. The problem was resolved with my mom promising to take care of my dad so as not to let him get bored during office hours. She kept trying to see my dad in the office during lunch just so he would have someone to talk to.

 

It was there that I saw my mom’s strength. She has been carrying this family so much over the years, ever since we were kids. She was strong. Even until now that she needs someone to be strong for her.

 

It broke my heart to leave them at home. But then again, I am my own self. I should live a life of my own. I don’t take away the possibility of living again in my parents’ house someday. But for now, I have to live my life. A window has been opened and the sun seems shining bright outside.

 

Where I came from, there were birds and a lot of it chirping when you wake up. My room had a little sun roof, just enough to warm me up as the sun rises. My dad is an agriculturist and we have lots of greens in the front and side lawns. We have orchids of red, purple, yellow and white among many others. Fruit and hardwood trees were growing by the day. The soft morning breeze welcomes you with sweetness.

 

Where I am now, the sound of cars and busy streets wake you. The children rushing early to school are the sight. Skyscrapers graze the skies as the night turns to day. The big city never sleeps. It never pauses for breeze nor does it keep silent for a minute or two to hear the birds sing. It goes on like forever.

 

Slowly, things start to sink in, falling into place as I said. Many say you don’t get everything you want. True enough. The very reason why we have priorities – we decide depending on the most important things to us. Slowly and unknowingly at times, we are shaped by our priorities. We become what we think we are.

 

I have a few good reasons why I decided to grab this job that brought with it the new life. First, I want to save for a family I hope to have someday or in the near future. I hope to prepare well to be able to provide well for them. Another reason is, if in case I don’t stay too long on this job, at least I get to have their name in my resume. Well, practically speaking, their name in my records would like be a shining badge in my chest.

 

For now, the night is getting old and a new day is waiting for me a few ticks in the clock from now. The air is getting cooler and the bed lies softly as the view drowses me well. The battle is about to unfold. Wish me luck.

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The Only Way to Go is to Move Forward

Posted on May 31, 2008
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This morning, I got a call from the company I have been applying at. I have waited for this call for more than a month now. The result – I got the job. I tell you , as the job description was relayed through phone, I got overwhelmed. It hasn’t sinked in yet, even till now at the time of writing. The scope is big. Good thing I have 3 months to learn the craft. For sure, they won’t endorse to me what I couldn’t bear, hehe.

The offer is really good and the company, a really big one. You can find their products all around you. For sure it’s an offer of a lifetime. But honestly, there is still that part of me that clings on to the life I have known to love – to be in Davao, living a peaceful, comfortable life, tinkering with my computer in my room, waking up late, having a coffee while watching the garden. Yes, the job requires me to work somewhere else, specifically, Makati. Just the thought of it makes me tremble a bit. I have seen quite a lot of Metro Manila and honestly, the life there is one I never dream to have.

Still, I believe that every event in our life brings with it a purpose. I know not yet what this brings me. Hmm, I remember my little prayer a few months ago. I told Him that I hope I could get a job with the course I studied with a twist of Info Tech. True to it, I got a position just like the one I prayed about. Waaaah. Be careful with what you pray for, I tell you.

I did call some of my siblings right after the job offer and for them, I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I agree. My thinking is if this really doesn’t work out for me after doing my very best, then Davao is still waiting for me with open arms. It would be much more difficult to deal with “what might have been” issues later, hehe.

After almost a year of unemployment and making the most out of my blogging and web designing and graphics editing earnings, I went to the thinking of how I want my life to be in the next five or ten years. I have always wanted to have my own family soon and, thinking if I would remain with what I am doing right now, for sure I wouldn’t be able to give my family a descent life. I mean of course, I want the best for my future family and my current earning doesn’t even allow me to have a health insurance. Somewhere down the road, I decided to give it a try again with the corporate world. And here it is, knocking at my doorstep – again.

God really does work in mysterious ways. Really really fascinating. His timing and placing of things, if you’re keen enough to observe are really small miracles of life. I think this is what this is all about. This change in my life is a chance to prove that God has been and still is, making tiny miracles in our lives today. I know not yet in what form those will come but I’m quite sure there will be a lot of it.

For sure he has been doing those tiny little miracles on you too. Have you tried getting really worried of being late on an exam, only to find out that the teacher got sick and that the exam was postponed? Or have you tried needing a certain amount of money to get home when suddenly a friend comes and treats you with a free ride in the jeepney? I realized now how I have been missing out the good stuff that happens day after day after day in my life. I forgot how powerful He is against the biggest problem we could ever imagine. This is a chance to prove it once more.

A new place, a new culture, a new job. Life is a constant change. Imagine living your incoming five years the very same way you spent your last five years. Lousy. Very Lousy. Not to mention you, being bored to death. The good thing is, God is a God of variations and fun. Look at all the creatures of the ocean or the peoples of the world. The variations are simply illustrations of how infinite God’s creativity is. The that each of us take are nothing different. Each are hand-crafted by God with its tiniest details. Not that we no longer have a choice on how to live our lives. But if we heed it, you’ll find your life much much more exciting and fun!

I hope we are sensitive enough to how God is molding us in every situation we are in. We are dynamic people created by a limitless God. I don’t deny the fact that I have anxieties and fears. Yet, choosing to always look at the brighter side of life seems to be the best option for now. For me, the only way to go is to move forward. Just don’t forget to smell the flowers along the way (keeping a listening heart and clasping hands).

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My Day Has Just Ended

Posted on February 1, 2008
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What I really mean is that my birthday has just ended and another year is ahead of me. I hope this time, I could find more things to do, things to learn, avenues for work and earning and more income for saving. I may be young now but I won’t be so forever. I need to save for my future and plan wisely.

Lately, I realized that there is a great difficulty in letting go of things that you are accustomed to. Just as a butterfly who earns its strong wings by breaking through the cocoon, so does a person who is able to get out of his or her comfort zone to explore and see things for himself. Money earned is way more fulfilling than money given. Self preservation however is innate and getting out of that thinking requires determination and maturity.

For now, I would have to do with the best way I could with what my hands find to do. Little meaning is given for lives constantly spent on yearning for something not yet achieved for humans would always find something that is lacking, whatever it may be. Plan ahead if you must. Dream for reaching the top of the mountain but don’t forget to smell the flowers and hear the birds singing along the way.

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